I finally completed the edit of REDNECK P.I. and re-published it after the time limit on my publishing contract expired and the rights reverted back to me.
A winning mix of vulgarity and sensitivity...
Twila Taunton, a spunky redneck, self-centered and intractable and champion of the underdog is back. Follow the gutsy heroine in a delightful romp as she flaunts her rough-edged appeal using raunchy, politically incorrect dialogue while Hunky Harland O'Connor lends a much-needed dose of sensibility, and whacky hard-toking, whisky drinking Great Aunt Essie riding her Harley makes for laugh out loud comedy.
Then there's Gasser Cunha, the farting hacker, and did I mention Piggy-Sue, the miniature pot-bellied pig who gets to ride across country on a Harley.
Here are the first few lines:
REDNECK P.I. CHAPTER 1
THE WORDS OF A CO-WORKER bitch started the whole thing.
She hadn't done a very good job of tracking my whereabouts that morning, and obviously didn't know I was in one of the restroom stalls, with my pants on the ground.
"I wonder if that little redneck, Twila, will be able to find a half-decent man to bring to the picnic." Snickers from the other bitches. "She's gotta be a lesbo, or something. I've never seen her even look at a man, and besides, what man is going to want to be seen with fat white trash like her?"
Those pants were pulled up and zipped quicker than a gunslinger can draw his revolver, but not quick enough. If she had still been there when I burst out of my stall, I would have kicked her ass to kingdom come, but she had left and the opportunity had passed.
The only thing I could do now to save face was go to the company picnic, which I had previously not intended to do, and bring a man twice as hot as any of the pasty faced city boys they would drag along.
I just happened to know the perfect one.